’Tis the Season When Kids Want Tech Gifts. Here’s How to Feel Good Saying Yes

It’s happening: My kids are getting their own Chromebook for the holidays. I know this may sound like a nonevent—plenty of parents I know (and admire!) long ago embraced giving kids their own devices, and plenty of the girls’ friends already have their own laptops, tablets, and smartphones. But our family has long stayed in a comfortable holding pattern closer to the other end of the tech spectrum: Our three kids, ages nine, seven, and four, use the family-room TV or a couple communal tablets (super outdated, rarely charged) on weekends. They also borrow my laptop, using it on the kitchen island where we can easily see what they’re up to. In other words, nobody’s had a personal device, and the hover-and-peek technique has been my main form of parental control.

This tech strategy—or lack thereof—has worked fine for a long time, but now we’re at a place where we would clearly all benefit from giving the older two kids more ownership of their tech. As they’ve grown, their screen time has become infinitely more nuanced than it was when they were little. There are so many productive activities they use screens for: printing coloring pages and worksheets they use to play school, doing homework and messaging their teachers in Google Classroom, streaming music during playdate dance sessions, practicing their math facts or music (Mom doesn’t know her way around a guitar or flute!), emailing or video-calling their grandparents, or clicking through our treasure trove of digital family photos/videos. I’ll even admit that the annoying YouTube channels I let them watch on weekend mornings have helped them learn some pretty awesome dance and gymnastic moves. Giving the girls access to these activities via their own computer would give me new ways to enforce time limits and monitor who’s doing what—beyond my usual hover-and-peek. Separate log-ins/desktops would keep their school websites and games organized, and I could curate what each kid can see. Plus, let’s be honest: I’m also just tired of getting my laptop back with a slightly sticky keyboard and 19 browser tabs open. (I do my work on this thing, people!)

The Chromebook recently arrived, giving us time to tinker with it before holiday gift-wrapping time. I felt a little bit like I was cracking open a sleek metallic Pandora’s box. Let’s be honest: Part of my reluctance to give the kids their own devices was having to figure out what system I’d use to manage them. Obviously, I wasn’t going to just hand it over and give the kids free rein. And thinking ahead to a time when all three kids are using different devices in different places, keeping track of it all feels like such an uphill task—when they’re using devices, where, and for what purpose. Parental controls clearly help, but there are so many options, from software to whole-house devices to apps, each compatible with different devices. It’s enough to make an already overwhelmed mom’s head explode.