Missing Iowa Student Mollie Tibbetts Found Dead

And though the onus should not be put on us to dismantle that violence, it goes without saying that there are ways we can make sure we're being vigilant. “What I can tell you is that [women] are susceptible to the pervasive violence of the day at any given moment,” Gloria Marcott, a self-defense expert and law enforcement officer, tells Glamour.

Marcott advises women to always stay alert and to keep tabs on the people around you. “First and foremost, have your situational awareness intact—that means focusing on the world around you as you are running,” she says. “As soon as you identify that someone is following [you], it’s time to immediately escalate your response. And by escalate your response, I mean you become the absolute biggest problem for that person following you.”

Quickly change the direction you’re running in. If possible, look for a business or a heavily populated foot-traffic area to go to. Flag down any cars that you see. Shout to let others know you need help and to let the attacker know that you’re on to them. If that person starts to approach or attack you, Marcott says prepare to punch, kick, and strike the vital target areas, including the eyes, throat, and groin. “Your violence of action must be more than the violence coming at you,” she explains. “If you only have your hands to solve this problem, it has to be fierce, and it has to attack critical areas.”

If you run or jog, tips about awareness are common, exhaustive even. The reality is that these tips, always geared towards women, likely won’t make violence against us any less pervasive. Our own alertness won’t make men feel any less entitled to harass women.

It is simply not our fault.

Women do not exist for the mindless consumption, whether verbally or physically, of men. Respecting women really comes down to respecting our boundaries—from the bedroom, to the track, and on the open road.

For Tibbetts, she deserved that and more. But in the wake of her death, as family and friends continue to mourn, it's important that we frame the conversation in a way that doesn't suggest any blame or inaction on her part, but instead addresses a societal issue that affects us all.

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